"Starting Again"

​

At the dawn ... off what's left of my days, I stand ... alone,

half-carved from regret, half-built from bone.

 

A worn-out soul with truths I dodged too long,

the silence leans in ... it knows I was wrong.

 

The wind doesn't shout ...

it slides ... it slips ... it sighs low,

like it's got somewhere deeper it wants me to go.

And I feel it, in the lows I don't show.

 

Now I sit still with different and clearer eyes,

cutting truth from the fabric of old disguise.

And the man I was? Yeah ... I see him very clear,

but he doesn't fit the frame that I let appear.

 

Young, I dance thinking I'd never fall,

and in that dance I thought it would never come,

running in youthful wildness, fast and dumb.

No weight, no chain, no voices in my head,

just a reckless freedom in the lies that I said.

 

Now, I sit still with a different set of eyes,

learning the truth, cutting it from the old disguise.

And the man I was? Yeah ... I see him clear ...

but he don't fit the frame that I'm standing in here.

 

There's a fire ... not the kind that warms ... the kind that takes,

running wild in my blood, every nerve it shakes.

Skin lit up like a fuse burning down to the wire,

itching, crawling ... a living, breathing hell fire.

 

Time stretches into seconds that refuse to move,

each one has something weighty to prove.

Cold sweat drips, while the room spins tight,

I'm bargaining with shadows throughout the night.

 

No coin. No fix. No easy release.

just a war in my chest screaming give me some peace.

Dry mouth ... cracked words ... nothing left to sell,

every breath tastes bitter ... like I swallowed hell.

 

But the wind comes back ... yeah ... it always does.

Not loud, not proud ... just quiet because ...

men like me are on the edge, on the bend,

where breaking ain't breaking... it's learning to mend.

 

So I stand ... not whole ... but more than before,

with less to hide and nothing to ignore.

And that soft wind sigh? Yeah, I know it now...

It's the sound... just the sound of...

starting again.

starting again.

starting again.

Yes, I’m… starting again.

​

-Peter